


I Know It's Your Birthday, But I Still Prefer To Text

by orphan_account



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-17
Updated: 2012-01-17
Packaged: 2017-10-29 16:59:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/322102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which John begrudgingly turns one year older and leaves for work early without letting Sherlock give him his presents.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Know It's Your Birthday, But I Still Prefer To Text

_John. Why did you leave this morning without waking me up? SH_

 _That was very rude, John. I didn’t think I would have to teach you manners. SH_

 _Stop ignoring me, John. I know you don’t have any patients right now. SH_

 _John. SH_

 _John. SH_

 _John. SH_

 **Sherlock! What is it? I’m trying to work.**

 _There aren’t any patients, John. Just paperwork. Surely I’m more important that paperwork? SH_

 **Still. It’s unprofessional.**

 **Okay, I know, says the man that fell asleep at work. Alright, I give in. What was so rude about me leaving this morning?**

 _John. I wanted to say goodbye. I told you that. You didn’t wake me. SH_

 **It was early! You need to get more sleep.**

 _John. It’s your birthday. I wanted to say “Happy Birthday,” alright? SH_

 **You wanted to say happy birthday?**

 _Don’t mock me. Sometimes social niceties must be observed. SH_

 **Right. And now was a good day to start?**

 _It’s your birthday, John. It’s important. SH_

 **Don’t remind me.**

 _Oh, if I have to hear one complaint about 37 being old, I will refuse to speak to you for the rest of the week, which will severely put a damper on my presents for you. SH_

 **Presents? You got me presents?**

 **What are they?**

 **Sherlock?**

 **Okay, fine. I promise not to complain.**

 _Thank you. SH_

 **So? What are the big presents? Dinner and sex?**

 _Well, obviously, yes. But I did have one more thing in mind. SH._

 **Which is?**

 _Well, what do you get the non-materialistic man such as yourself, John? SH_

 **You stop signing your name after every text?**

 _Very funny, John. SH_

 **Seriously, though, I know it’s you. It’s been established. I am not quite as stupid as you think. It only took me about 10 texts to figure out who it was.**

 _Oh, I never knew you were so witty. As you wish._

 **So, Sherlock?**

 _So? You’ll have to be more specific, John._

 **You know bloody well what I am talking about, Sherlock.**

 **Sherlock?**

 **Fine. What did you get me, o literal one?**

 _Thank you, mocking aside. Well. I got you a list._

 **A list? How romantic. You sure do know how to woo ‘em.**

 **What’s this list about then?**

 **Okay. Sorry. No more mocking. I’m completely serious and am extremely interested in the contents of your list.**

 _I can still sense sarcasm, John, even through text. But, very well, since you’ve made an honest attempt at sober attention, I will tell you._

 _I made you a list of my favorite things about you. One for each year of your life._

 _John?_

 _Was that not a good present, John?_

 _I’m really trying, John._

 _John?_

 **Calm down, Sherlock. I was just momentarily stunned by the thoughtfulness of that present. So you really are a secret romantic, then?**

 _I have my moments. Would you care to see the list?_

 **Please.**

 _Since you asked nicely. No interruptions though. It’s rather long._

 _1.Your name_

 **My name?**

 _John._

 **Sorry. Sorry.**

 **Just, why my name?**

Alright. I’ll embellish a bit. Yes, your name. Why? Because it is so ordinary but so perfectly adorable at the same time. I like how it sounds when I say it. I like how perfectly it describes you.

 _2.Your nose. It’s cute. Don’t question me._

 _3.Your hair. I like that it is not one color. It’s unexpected, like you._

 _4.Your lips. Their shape. Their feel when I kiss them._

 _5.Your ears. They perk up slightly whenever you hear my voice. Don’t deny it, I’ve noticed._

 _6.Your eyebrows. I never knew that part of the body could be so expressive._

 _7.Your voice. So perfectly ordinary, but soothing and wonderful at the same time. I’ve never heard another like it._

 _8.Your voice when exasperated. I like it when you are frustrated, especially with me._

 _9.Your military habits. It makes you the only thing in my life not entirely chaotic._

 _10.Your height. Gives me perfect leverage and gives me a greater sense of self importance._

 **Not that you need a bigger ego boost.**

 _John. Don’t feel insecure about your height. You own it well. Plus it makes it much easier for me to pick you up and have my way with you._

 _I’ll take your silence as an indication to continue._

 _11.Your smile. It’s biggest when you are smiling at me. And that makes me feel incredibly lucky to receive it. I never want to go a day without seeing it._

 _12.Your tea addiction. I like that I am not the only addict in this relationship. Even if your addiction is laughably safe._

 _13.Your medical training. Heroes may not exist, but you are the closest thing I have found so far._

 _14.Your fussing over my health due to said medical training. Though I pretend to find it infuriating, I rather enjoy having you take care of me._

 _15.Your assistance at crime scenes. I truly do not know how I would manage without you._

 **Well, there’s always Anderson.**

 _Please, John, don’t plague my head with such terrible images. I thought today was going to be a pleasant one._

 **Sorry. Please continue.**

 _16.Your observance of social norms and niceties. Well, one of us has to, right? Better you than me._

 _17.Your social skills. Yes, sometimes I find that do not know the appropriate response to some emotional situations. I’d be lost without your assistance._

 _18.Your moral code. While maddening at times, I depend on your helpful reminders as to the legality of certain actions. Now, I may not always follow your advice, but it’s always good to have a second opinion._

 _19.Your persistence in teaching me said social norms. It’s never going to happen, John, though I appreciate the effort. Truly endearing._

 _20.Your persistence that I practice these social norms inside our own flat. I still will never understand why I have to keep the body parts in one area of the fridge, but I do love how passionately you try to convince me to do it._

 _21.The way you eat. There is something inexplicably charming about it._

 _22.Your jam fetish._

 **My jam fetish?**

 _Oh, that’s something I have planned for later. You’ll enjoy it. Trust me._

 **Oh Christ. Should I be afraid?**

 _John._

 **Right, stupid question. Of course I should.**

 **Well, continue.**

 **Please?**

 _Very well._

 _23.Your hands. Your hands are magnificent. I love to watch them. When you blog, when you write, when you gesticulate, when you hold a gun, when you are stroking my cock._

 **Sherlock! I’m at work!**

 _I know, John, which is what makes it all the more fun._

 _24.Your jumpers. I love how you can wear something only old women would consider fashionable and make it look sexy._

 _25.Your jumpers on the floor. Especially when I’ve removed them myself._

 _26.Your shoulders. Broad and sturdy. Like you. You keep me grounded._

 _27.Your scar. I hate the pain you endured because of it, but I love that it brought you to me._

 _28.Your abs. So well defined. Who knew? It’s hard to tell because of those baggy jumpers, but I like it this way. At least I don't have to put up with pathetic imbeciles ogling you._

 _29.Your skin. It’s soft and warm against me. It’s riddled with scars that show the world just how brave you are. It makes me proud to be associated with such a brave man._

 _30.Your arms. When they hold me, everything is right in the world._

 _31.Your brain. I like how I can practically hear it clicking when you think. I like how it stops clicking when I get too close._

 _32.Your eyes. Their unique color. Their expressiveness. The pupils dilating when you think of me._

 _33.Your voice. Again I know. But it is so delicious to hear you moan my name._

 _34.Your legs. When you straddle me. When I lift you up and force you against a wall and you wrap them around me and cling to me._

 _35.Your arse. One of the finer ones I’ve seen._

 **Sherlock!**

 _It’s true._

 _36.Your cock. Well. Need I say more on that subject? I can get rather explicit._

 **Don’t.**

 _Ah, no fun._

 **Sherlock?**

 **That was only 36.**

 _Sorry, I wasn’t sure if you had recovered from me insulting your delicate sensibilities._

 **I have. And I think you meant to say sense of propriety.**

 _Dull._

 **Fine. Dull. You win. Please just tell me the last one?**

 _This one is my favorite._

 _37.Your heart._

 _While I know that the heart is nothing more than an organ that circulates blood throughout the body, it has become famous for also being the emotional core of a person._

 _The metaphorical heart. John, I love your metaphorical heart._

 _Your heart is so welcoming. It is trusting and resilient. It has faced dangerous levels of trauma and it still functions better than the average mans._

 _Your heart is enormous. It was already so big when I met you, but it stretched anyway to make room for one more._

 _Your heart is giving. It is so giving that it broke off a piece of itself and gave it to me so that I might learn to have a heart of my own._

 _Your heart is the best part of you, John, and it is the best part of me. It is what gave the capability to love and it is what makes me love you to this day._

 _John?_

 _Was that too much? I thought I might be waxing a little too sentimental on that last one._

 _John?_

 **Sherlock. That was the most incredible thing I’ve ever heard.**

 _Read._

 **Yes, alright. Read. Where are you?**

 _I’m at the flat. Why?_

 **Do not move. I am on my way home as we speak.**

 _You still have two hours left on your shift? Do you feel alright?_

 **No, I do not feel alright. I feel idiotic.**

 _Why?_

 **Because my brilliant boyfriend whom I love had a romantic day planned out for my birthday, and I didn’t even wake him up for some morning birthday sex.**

 **Rest assured I am working as fast as I can to right this wrong.**

 _Don’t leave me waiting for long. You know what I’m like when I get impatient, John._

 **Oh God, yes I do.**

**Author's Note:**

> John/Sherlock, established relationship, pure fluff, texting!fic


End file.
